Dear Reader

Allow me to address you personally; firstly has the gas man been round about the boiler? Make sure he shows his badge before you let him in. Secondly, at this time of crumbling confidence, I think it is important that I address your concerns - you look lovely in that dress.

All sectors of the economy are finding the current economic climate difficult; growth has stalled, or reversed entirely in large parts of the economy. This is why I am so pleased to announce that MgFgTg is uniquely positioned to weather the hard times hurricane. Our zero profits, zero income strategy means our bush bears fruit while others, their bushes withered, are picking dried berries from the brambles that grow through our tarmac.

I am pleased to announce that this quarter we have made zero profit, absolutely no change from last quarter, this represents a massive achievement in a time when some of the financial giants of the city are having to cope with huge reductions in revenue. This is now the twelfth quarter in a row that we have maintained this level of profitability.

This kind of consistency, while so many of our competitors are succumbing to the sub-prime, crunch, trickle from Iceland (who buys those things?) is a huge achievement. With success comes rewards and with rewards come wanted posters:

Wanted - The Bling,

please send to the usual address.

Reader, rest assured MgFgTg shall be continuing to function. Crude oil might be ninety dollars a barrel, but crude jokes baby, they’re free and I’ll see you at the bar.

Kind regards

Mjohnson