This summer has been good for slugs, but not peppers. This is the only Red Pepper I've produced this year (so far, still hoping). Though to be honest the weather isn't completely at fault the plants got a bit smothered by the tomatoes.

Ramadan starts pretty soon, Ramadan is the ninth month of the Islamic Calendar and during this month Muslims are obliged to fast from sunrise to sunset. The date of Ramadan moves back approximately 11 days a year and performs a full cycle in relation to the solar year every 33 years. When the month of Ramadan falls in the middle of summer British Muslims may have to wait over 16 hours between drinks of water. If they lived on the North Pole they wouldn’t be able to drink for the whole month as the sun doesn't set for six months; and that’s why Mum-hamed hasn’t gone to Iceland.

Other than being one of the worst, most contrived jokes ever is that wrong in any other way? Please direct any abuse you might have here.This is my current favourite website. Paul Danan is a twat, a myspace page simply devoted to abusing the television celebrity Paul Danan. The comments are directed at the eponymous twat, though I don’t think he checks it that much as he hasn’t replied to any yet. Here is a flavour:

8 Jan 2007 - Have a miserable New Year you Bellend.

27 Dec 2006 - You are indeed cheesier than a tramp's cock!

6 Oct 2006 - I hated you way back when u were in hollyoaks u absolute chod.

And perhaps my favourite of all, 24 Feb 2007, from Sean: Thank you for adding me to your friends list.

Sean you’ve missed the point completely you avant-garde fuckwit.